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Lilla here. Today I’m sharing Part 2 of my FREE three-part #MATSprep warm up assignment ahead of My Kid Book Pitch, which starts Monday, October 24th. If you’ve ever wanted to write your very own children’s picture book, you won’t want to miss it.

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In this #MATSprep warm up exercise, I’ve been showing you how easy and enjoyable writing your own story can be. We’ve been having a bit of fun taking the terrible sentence that I wrote and using the poor thing as an example of how to improve your own writing.

 

Cami, a young girl, liked to draw big, grey anteaters with long snouts like the ones she saw yesterday at the zoo. She was going to carefully show them to her class next Monday. Suddenly, a dog chased her!

Yesterday, we removed the visual words and the first sentence became this:

Cami liked to draw anteaters.

You re-wrote it to show us why she likes to draw anteaters, rather than the text telling us. It’s not aways wrong to ‘tell’, but it’s a big important rule to ‘show, not tell’ in the writing biz. Why? Simply because your writing is going to be that much more interesting and engaging to read. And agents and editors want to see that you understand this concept in your writing.

If you missed Part 1, then go back and grab it here. I’ll wait.

Ready? On to Part 2.

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My made-up backstory on Cami was that she connects with anteaters because she feels weird and odd-looking like an anteater, so my version is this:

My mom asked me why I like to draw so many anteaters. She thinks they look a little weird.
“I draw them ‘cuz I feel like I am one,” I told her.

 

I also wrote it using dialogue so you could see how fun it is to write dialogue. Try writing your sentence in dialogue. I’ll hold.

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Art by Make Art That Sells student Erin Williams for My Kid Book Pitch. This course is designed especially to help you tap into your huge, magical imagination and find your own unique story.

Keep the Story Moving Forward

Today we’re going to look at chronology. Your book is going to be read to someone as young as about two years old, so it’s important that you don’t jump around in time, like writing flashbacks. Write the sentence in order. Examples are, “I saw my cat when I came home from school.” Switch it around to “When I came home from school, I saw my cat.”

Sometimes what happens when you put stuff in order is that you find that your sentence is not actually that interesting, like mine, above (isn’t).

Sometimes you’ll find you don’t even need to tell the order of things, traveling from thing to thing.

When you watch a movie, you might see the main character meeting a friend at a bar and then it cuts to her apartment with the person she just met.

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Art by Make Art That Sells student Shelly Laslo for My Kid Book Pitch. What will your story be about? Sign up and find out!

You don’t need to see that they walked home, and waited at a stoplight, and then took the F train and she took the key out of her bag and unlocked the door and went in. That can be tedious if all they want to do is get back to her apartment and play Jenga or watch a movie because they are old friends. Only give the traveling information if it’s important to the story, like, for example, if your characters are chatting about something meaningful along the way.

Maybe the characters just met and need that time to discuss things before agreeing to go to her apartment for a romantic encounter. Actually, that example kinda doesn’t apply so much to kid books. You want to know why? Not just because it’s sexy, but it’s because you only have around 500 words or less for your entire text, and about sixteen spreads. So keep it moving and stay on point. Of course, if your book is about the journey, then by all means make it about the journey. I just want you to consider cutting out transitions where they are not necessary.

(That’s where my Blobby worksheet in class comes in handy, to help you structure your story and figure out what goes where.)

Let’s go back to my original bad text. To keep it chronological, we’re going to remove that part ‘like the ones she saw yesterday, at the zoo.’ In fact, we really don’t need that at all! Who cares where she saw anteaters. No time to riff on that. Remember the 500 words guideline! (It’s not set in stone, and some books have many fewer words; some clock in at almost 1,000, but I want you to have your best shot at getting your book deal.)

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In My Kid Book Pitch, we’ll look at tons of gorgeous picture books together – including some of my vintage books – in one of the TWO live weekly Zooms, to find out what makes them so great.

Just for fun, rewrite your text in the present tense

Many books are written in past tense, like “Filo ate cherries and texted a friend.” It’s totally great to write in past tense.

I love to write in present tense. That’s just my personal preference. It has an immediacy, so why not give it a try? I want you to have tools in your writing toolkit.

 

Cami liked to draw anteaters. She was going to show them to her class next Monday.

 

Let’s change that to:

Cami likes to draw anteaters.
She’s pretty sure that she’s going to get one in the Oddison School art show this time.

 

By writing ‘this time,’ it lets us know that she’s tried to get into the show in the past.

By saying that she’s pretty sure that she’s going to get her work in the school show, it lets us know that she’s feeling hopeful, somewhat confident about her art. She may or may not have reason to be hopeful, as we would learn.

Maybe her art looks so amazing in the actual illustrations of the book that we are convinced she’ll get in the show, and we, as the reader, are rooting for her.

Maybe her drawings of anteaters look a bit more like cockroaches, so we’re afraid that she’s going to be let down big time. This is a device in writing where the narrator (Cami) thinks one thing, but we (the reader) see the reality, the truth, which is clearly the opposite. It can used for hilarious effect (as in Jon Klassen’s This is Not My Hat).

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Creative people like you have amazing minds which are perfect for inventing appealing characters and making up unique stories, like this one by Make Art That Sells student Holly Swain. What will yours look like?

Want to give it a try? Take your sentence from yesterday, and pause for a moment to make up what Cami wants to be in the show, or doesn’t want to be in the show, or whether she gets in or doesn’t. Or whatever. And now add something about the show to your piece.

Write out your sentence, illustrate it if you like, even if it’s just a stick figure, and share it online. Make sure you use the hashtag #MATSprep and tag @makeartthatsells so I can see it.

Want to write your very own picture book? Now’s the time – this course won’t run again until 2023! Sign up here.

For Part 3 of your #MATSprep, next Thursday, we’ll take a look at adverbs and why they are evil. Just kidding. Sort of.

Until next time,

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PS. Want to chat about the #MATSprep, writing children’s picture books or anything else? Then JOIN ME on Friday, October 21st at 12 noon ET/5 pm BST for a FREE live Zoom event! I’ll be showing off some of my favorite new picture books and talking about why I love them, taking your questions and giving away a FREE place in class!

PPS. Want to save 25% on My Kid Book Pitch? The Children’s Book Bundle 2022 includes My Kid Book Pitch, Illustrating Children’s Books PLUS and Lilla’s Art Recipes: Drawing Faces, with a tasty 25% saving! Find out more and sign up here.

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